Let me share a little about myself,
My name is Phoebe Bruce, I’m a thirty something year old, and I live in a little township called Tingoora, in rural QLD.
I have tried my hand at many roles over the course of my life; I have been a registered nurse, a youth worker, teacher aide, disability support worker, yoga teacher to name a few. I am currently studying a diploma in somatic psychotherapy and dabbling in a social work degree.
I enjoy making art, crafting, and generally using my hands. I play the piano. I love the feeling of connection I often have when I am in nature, and I enjoy playing with plants and paints.
These are some things I feel to be true.
There is more to tell, and in the telling my goal is to be real and honest. I say this, because I have been a girl of many masks for much of my life. I have worked so hard at perfecting an image of myself to portray to the world; I have cut and polished, sanded back, refined and embellished. I have lied, avoided, pretended and harmed; all in the name of holding onto my facade – this idea of myself and who I think I should be. I’ve been told that our facade is first created when we are really little babies, being taught what is and is not acceptable by our environment. I have then made the choice as an adult to hold onto, and add to, this false version/s of myself.
I have become a master of disguise; so good in fact, that I am having a hard time accepting the truth that there is actually something else under all this facade, someone who is maybe even kinda cool and worth knowing. From what I’ve heard, that’s the real me in there; the one that was created perfect by God.
Growing up I didn’t have a strong feeling about God; my mum converted to Catholicism and had me attend a Catholic school when I was 8 for three years. I don’t remember learning anything about God except some cool songs which have stayed with me for years. I suppose I became an agnostic of sorts, more aligned with New Age ideas of God as an energy source, and as already being a part of each and every person and living thing. I guess I found the concept of God as a Being I could have a personal relationship with a bit cringe-worthy and religious-sounding. Even once I started to feel this to be the Truth, I have shied away from sharing what I have discovered. I have been way too invested in what people think about me, and God just has not been on top of the cool-list or social conversation starters!
But I’m starting to feel that God is actually pretty cool…
I’m beginning now to get a sense that She knows me better than anyone, and wants to share with me what She knows. God wants me to discover my true personality, passions and desires. God wants to help me heal my hurts, and assist me in undoing some of the damage I have done to myself and others. That’s a pretty awesome parent, one who’s attributes are distinctly different to those of my, and most other’s, parent’s on earth.
So this blog is a place for me to share my ponderings and musings as I unravel the tangles in my soul. Thanks for stopping by!